Flipping The Switch: Shifting Your Mindset to Create Positive Progress in Your Life
INTRO
I found myself in a personal and, especially, professional rut a few years ago. I was languishing on the perceived negative aspects in my life and not appreciating the positives.
Through a set of experiences, I made the decision to intentionally work toward improving my attitude and perspective. The result is I created an internal positive change and mindset to move forward from negative experiences. Learn from them, but move forward.
This is my story of how I made the shift and attained a more fulfilling life simply by flipping the switch.
OVERVIEW
I was (and thankfully still am) in a really good place both personally and professionally. My wife and I are in solid financial health with no debt, reliable income, and a solid retirement plan. We made intentional choices and sacrifices in the past to get where we wanted to be in both the present and the future. Both our children are independent and successful by their own efforts with we as parents providing expectations and support.
My job was steady and secure, working with good people and valued. I work a manageable schedule and have PTO for vacations and projects. Many would gladly trade places with me.
And yet, I did not feel satisfied with where my career was and, more importantly, I had no path for growth. Not due to lack of merit or value. As a small company, we're flat for organizational/management structure, with little opportunity for growth and advancement.
Before the “flip the switch” moment, I had been attempting to move to a different industry entirely in a role where I would have more of a direct leadership responsibility with growth potential. Despite all my experience and skills, attempts at changing careers to a different industry failed.
After my kids were older and less dependent on me, I started to feel like I was missing something in my career and life. Call it a mid-life crisis or just increased self awareness of the situation. I sought out any kind of help I could find to figure out what it was I needed to do to get to a better place internally and externally.
I digested dozens of leadership and personal growth books, podcasts, webinars and presentations. The upside was learning so much valuable information for my own growth. However, the downside was learning about all these places with great culture and intentional growth opportunities that I was seemingly unable to break into. I did my best to follow a connection and relationship route to get there rather than sending resumes en masse to get lost in a pile. I did form some valuable connections, but nothing led to where I thought I wanted to be.
The root of all this inner turmoil was that I’ve always wanted to “make a difference”. Where this collapsed for me is that I failed to define what that meant or how it would look in reality.
WHAT IS FLIPPING THE SWITCH?
This started when I listened to my brother talk about a situation in his business where he had a setback beyond his and his partner's control. He didn't blame anyone or waste time on what happened in the past and why it happened, but immediately focused on moving forward. His business partner continued to focus on the negative and past events beyond their control. My brother's remark to his business partner was to shift his mindset and priorities to moving forward and “flip the switch” to look at the positive outcomes and future opportunities. Although his narrative wasn't intended for me, it did resonate with me and inspired me to some serious self-awareness reflection to move my mind to a better place.
It took bottoming out emotionally and the timing of my brother's experience to figure out a solution, which was making the decision to flip the switch internally.
Flipping the switch is as simple as changing your mindset to focus your time and energy on positive progress.
PATH TO POSITIVE PROGRESS
Although I'm usually a “glass half full” person, I had slipped into a “glass half empty” mindset. I’ve had a few negative phases in my life, and had to work to get out of them, and continue to work to stay out of them.
First thing was to get back to some optimism, and that starts with gratitude and appreciation for all the good things that really matter. For me it is:
I have a wife that loves me unconditionally despite all my many flaws.
My kids are successful and making a positive difference.
I have wonderful friends that are loyal, accepting and would do anything for me (and have).
I have a good job working with good people.
How do I build on that to find more meaning in what I do to serve others and drive positive progress in all aspects of my life?
It’s as simple as bringing a great attitude to everything you do on a consistent basis. Finding the positive instead of the negative. Taking personal responsibility for a great outcome. Challenging yourself to go beyond what you thought you could. And believing that you have something valuable to contribute and moving it forward. Chances are, most people will tell you later what a great idea it was and thank you for doing it.
Take ownership of yourself. It's much easier to blame someone else, something else, the economy, elected officials, the boss: anything but yourself. Requires acceptance of your own human flaws and the willingness and work to own your success and failure. I believe this was another big part of my flipping the switch. The two work together.
Finally, you need to surround yourself with good people with similar beliefs. Not to isolate from people that don’t agree with everything you do, but similar core beliefs.
My self-awareness is a product of all the great people I’ve met over the years that took the time and energy to help me and impart some wisdom: even when I didn’t know it at the time.
My success is your success.
FLIPPING THE SWITCH IN ACTION
My specific success story is when I applied flipping the switch to my career. This was the root of my frustrations that was causing problems in all areas of my life. I believed I was in this world for more than what I was doing at that time.
I decided to flip the switch, be proactive and intentional about what I was doing in my career. How could I build off what I have? What were the core things I found lacking, and how could I take the initiative to improve them? What were the key problems I was observing and how could I contribute to solving instead of complaining about them?
My big picture goal was to figure out how I could build and improve culture to create the kind of idyllic place where I want to work. This started with leadership. I challenged the owners to be better leaders. I took the initiative to be a leader. Leading up is helping a leader realize their potential and creating an expectation for them to do more than maintain the status quo.
I had to shift from telling them things I thought were valuable and why they should embrace my ideas. Instead, I focused on what I could do to sell an idea that is important to me, and then take responsibility for the outcome with their blessing. And it worked. These are great people who care deeply about everyone in the company. All I did was to frame the importance of being an intentional leader and draw out what was already there.
The second part was to invite others into a group I formed to work on improving company culture. We created the LE&D Team, which is for Leadership, Education & Development. We are volunteers from all departments working on our own time to improve the work experience. This includes social events, process improvement, training, education and overall employee development. The intent is to create a culture where people can continue to grow and be challenged without having a traditional large company ladder to climb.
It works because the owners support it and it creates value with employees since they feel empowered in decision making. This allows employees to contribute to the experience with what's important to them and use their unique talents. We've made steady progress and still have much work to do, but the key is we made the decision to create the culture and bring our passion to what we are doing.
Once I had established there was a measurable value to the LE&D Team, I was invited to be part of the overall leadership team. Although not a specific department manager, my contributions to driving positive progress and perspectives on leadership were considered essential for our continued growth and success.
The affirmation happened a few years later when I received a special award for my contributions from the owners. They said some wonderful things about me during a company meeting about challenging them to be better leaders and contributing to the improvement and success of the company. I was truly touched by this!
I use this as an example to inspire others to do the same. I'm nothing special. I only decided to flip the switch and apply it to my career. I was able to contribute to building a better place for me and those around me.
You can do this! The world needs you to do this!
FINAL THOUGHTS
If you want to SEE change, you have to BE change.
Get out of your comfort zone, try new and challenging things. Something as simple as doing a task with your non-dominant hand, or using a different locker at the gym, or different workout, or try cooking a new food. Any small change is a place to start.
Small steps like this re-wire the mind, which will give you the power to shift on bigger things.
Do something adventurous that scares you a bit and takes you out of your comfort zone.
What have you always wanted to try, but fear and uncertainty held you back? Do that!
Bring your passion to everything you do, work and otherwise. That was an early “lightbulb” for the flipping the switch transition. Show up with passion and energy and a positive attitude and it’s amazing how even a mundane task is rewarding. You will find that you provide a better experience for your customers, coworkers, friends and family. In doing so, you'll improve your own life in the process.
I was fortunate to have many good mentors throughout my life, and I’m looking for opportunities to give back. Anything I can do that could help someone grow and find happiness, I’m in. For those in a similar position, I ask and challenge you to do the same for someone else.
For those starting out, seek out quality experienced mentors. You'll be surprised how willing people are to give you a few minutes of their time and wisdom if you ask. I've struck up conversations with CEO's of multi-billion dollar companies and had a meaningful conversation because I was willing to walk up and asked them a question. Most successful people want to help others do the same, but few engage in this type of conversation. I'm an extreme introvert, if I can do it, you can do it.
My takeaway from all these experiences is that you make a difference where you can in the best way you can. Yes, there are those who truly define their passion and live it out from early on. People who have that kind of single focus and vision inspire me. But most of us don’t have that strong and focused defining passion. It took me a long time to figure out that we are all valuable and have something to contribute. It only takes a little work, time and focus to find it. “You matter, and you have what it takes!” (Ken Coleman)
I spent a good portion of my life not consistently tapping into my creative talents because I was always told that it wasn’t practical. Now, I’m embracing my inner artist and bringing it to all parts of my life. I'm thankful that I have a job that allows me the freedom to pursue this in my “off time”, and it doesn’t matter if it ever produces income. But the bottom line is that I’m making the time to do it, as it brings me joy.
I try (and still sometimes fail) to bring the flipping the switch mindset to everything I do. Sure, there are frustrating times, but I try not to let it dominate my thoughts like I used to. Take the challenge to solve the problem and improve the situation.
My belief is that we can all make a positive impact in whatever our sphere of influence is. Big or small, it's important to take responsibility and act on it. All it takes is the commitment to solve problems and some vision to get a process, department, business and, most importantly, yourself, to a better place.
We have so much to be thankful for, so many opportunities, so much good going on. Focus on that and find where you can flip your switch and contribute to a better life for you and those around you.